SunAgape's Spot: Why do I take time off?

Showing posts with label Why do I take time off?. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Pause. That Refreshes!

I know a lot of people who think that I just go go go all the time. If you could see me on a Tuesday evening, or a Sunday, you would know that’s not quite true.

I know how to relax. I am good at taking down time. I excel at free time. I am a master of leisure. Oh, yeah. I go for quality.

When I take time off, when I take a break, or vacate my daily life, it’s kind of like hitting the reset button. A very tiny example is that, after I have done a sparkly clean on the house, I like to leave for a while, run a couple errands, maybe, or go for a walk, and then come back in to my sparkly house. I appreciate it so much more after a little separation from it.

I generally take a little respite on the porch between coming home from work and going in the house. I like to let go of the day. I appreciate the good stuff, sort through the other stuff for lessons, plans, silver linings, and whatnot, and then let it go. I like to think of it as taking my emotional shoes off at the door. I walk into my home feeling free and happy to be there.

Do be do be do. By just doing, we make certain kinds of progress. We achieve things in our work and play, we maintain stuff, we go places. By just being, we make a different kind of progress. We come to know our deep selves, our quiet mind. We can often give our overstimulated feelings a rest. We can relax, soften, find serenity. We can take off our emotional shoes.

I have learned that, for me, taking a moment here or there can make a huge difference in my level of satisfaction, in the quality of my day. Lots of little places where a couple of minutes to just breathe with awareness will make a huge difference for my insides, but not make much of an impact on my time.

Pausing to breathe.

Why would I choose to relax? How could I choose peaceful? What would make me serene?

When I relax into my peaceful core, I enjoy everything so much more. It’s harder for me to feel annoyed. It’s easier to get stuff done.

Do you remember the old saw, A change is as good as a rest?

Sometimes, what will refresh me the most is doing something new. I have a couple friends with whom I like to do something new. We will go to a part of town we’ve never been to, and treat it as though we are on holiday, with our cameras and tourist mindsets. A new coffee shop, a new cafe or museum, a new park and a little while later, a fresh outlook.

Taking time off can stimulate new thought. It can produce solutions to situations where we felt stymied. It can spur creativity, juice up inspiration. It can motivate us. But it won’t do any of those things unless we take it.

Why do I choose to take a break? What makes me take a breather? Why would I enjoy free time?

By building a little breathing room into our days, we ensure that we feeling more balanced, more productive, and happier. A little time here and there, a block or two of time in a week, a holiday to do something completely different; these are all ways that we keep our lives feeling light and satisfying.

How have I changed from always plugging away to enjoying my time away?

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Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Respecting My Free Time

Aren’t routines great? We can get stuff done in an efficient and effective manner, almost without thought. Some of our routines are wonderful. They keep us healthy, clean, organized, social.

Some of our routines are not so wonderful. They park us in front of the TV or computer for hours, or start us on mood-altering consumables, or keep us running complaints.

Routines help us manage our time well. So how can we get ourselves set up to use them wisely, to support and enrich our lives?

Why can I choose? Why is it all just so easy? Why do I like what I do?

What are my routines that I like? My getting up’n’attem routine for starting my day? Am I efficient? Is it enjoyable? Can I make it nicer, or better so I feel good first thing? How are my other favorite routines? What can I do to make those more streamlined, or more fun?

What are my routines that don’t serve me? Do I have routines for wasting time? Do I have routines for procrastination? Do I have routines for self-abuse?

When we want to change these routines or habits, we need to notice some stuff. Some people are really good at just stopping. For me, it depends on the habit.

Noticing that I have that routine or habit is critical. So often, with this sort of thing, we are blind to it because it’s automatic. Our first task, then, is to notice that we have a pattern of behavior that we want to change. I can often do that by noticing I don’t feel good.

I used to have a horrible feeling of procrastination certain days when I got home from work. Once I noticed that feeling I didn’t like, I was able to start paying a little attention to it, and realized that the feeling was “procrastinating.” Step one was complete.

The next piece is to see when the pattern actually starts. This can be tricky, because it often involves unconscious thinking.

I looked at what I did on those days when I felt procrastinate-y. My end result was watching TV all evening. I keep my TV upstairs, so climbing those stairs seemed like the start of it.

One of my great routines is spending some time on my porch after being out, and taking off my emotional shoes, so to speak, before I go into the house. I use the time to think about stuff that needs thinking on. So I thought about that habit. I recognized that I decided to go upstairs to watch TV instead of doing stuff that felt productive often before I even got in the house. Sometimes when I was miles away. It wasn’t a conscious word-type thought, it was a feeling. The feeling was kind of a comfort-relief-avoidance thing, totally familiar once I got it.

Recognizing the very beginning of the pattern we want to change means that we can change it much more easily, since we have Creative Questions. How have I changed from procrastinating with the TV to really enjoying doing my tasks first? Why can I choose? Why is it just so easy?

By taking time to know ourselves, we make our lives that much richer. We will always be the one person who can be there for us regardless of our situation.

How have I changed from wasting my time to treating my free time with respect?

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Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Tasks and Leisure

So, what do you like to do when you aren’t doing what you have to do? There is an old saw that I love, “To have leisure is to live as the gods.”

I like to joke that I will spend my free time lying on the floor staring at the ceiling. I always imagine it with my arms spread wide and a stupid grin on my face, a posture I spent time in as a kid on lovely summer days, cloud gazing.

Ahhhh.

But I digress.

I think about my ancestors, and how their lives were compared to the way I get to live. I think about how hard the women worked to keep their homes, how hard the men worked, and how uncomfy stuff was. I mean, I love central climate control. I love vacuums and other machines that make stuff so fast and easy. They worked their patooties off so that now I can enjoy some free time pretty much every day. Thank you, ancestors!

Why do I take time off? What makes me relax? Why do I enjoy my hobby?

Leisure time is priceless. I was fascinated to learn that our word “school” comes from the ancient Greek word for leisure. Many of us have stuff to do to keep our lives, and the lives of our loved ones, running smoothly. We have to wash stuff, and sweep stuff, and wipe stuff down, and change stuff, and buy stuff and put stuff away. We have to do a lot of that every day. And then we have to acquire and consume food and drink, clean ourselves, dress ourselves, move ourselves around, rest ourselves. Whew!

When we have down time, we have time to make choices that can enhance our lives. We can choose from a wide assortment of activities that will make stuff better, give us joy, and be fun. When we stay on top of our stuff, we don’t need to run away from our feelings, and so we can use our leisure enjoying ourselves rather than distracting ourselves. I like that so much more.

As we get better at using our leisure time, we may discover a hobby or hobbies that we love. Some of us decide that we will make a living from our hobby, and do that. Some of us decide that we love the change of scenery that we get from our hobby. Some of us like to learn stuff in our leisure time. Some of us like to travel, or see shows, or be in shows. Choices abound for wonderful, fun, interesting, challenging, delightful ways to spend our time.

How do I enjoy my free time? Why do I value my leisure? What makes me take down time?

When we have balance between our work and play, we feel good. We feel satisfied and productive in our labors, and satisfied and productive in our off-time. When we let that balance go off-kilter, we may feel like a drudge, or taken advantage of at our work, or we may feel bored or at loose ends in our free time. Being able to pick up on this right away is another advantage of being self-aware. Once we notice it, we can modify what we are doing to that we regain our balance. One of the activities that helps me keep that sense of balance is my meditative time on my porch between the end of my work day and the beginning of my evening activities.

How have I changed from being out of balance to enjoying both my task time and leisure time?

What are your favorite leisure activities?

Monday, December 16, 2013

Running on Full

Okay, so here is something that I’ve noticed in a lot of us. We take time off, but we don’t take down time. What’s the deal with that? It’s truly as silly as saying, “I don’t have time to stop for gas!”

It boils down to this. Each of us, from time to time, needs to vacate our life. Vacation, vacate, neato, huh? Pretty much anything can become routine and “normal.” The more routinized we get, the less we have to pay attention, and the next thing you know, it’s three months later and you wonder, “what the heck, where did the time go?”

Time doesn’t fly because we get older, time flies because we stop paying attention to it.

Isn’t that interesting?

Time doesn’t fly away like it used to since I learned about this. All I have to do is pay a little attention to the day, the week, the month, the year, every day. I tend to do that sitting on my porch, looking at my little slice of nature.

But I digress.

Digressing from what we normally do refreshes us. It’s like hitting a reset button. All I have to do is either something I’ve never done before, or rarely, or something really different that I really like, and, BAM, I am ready to go again with awareness and presence and joy.

So, on the one hand, there is the old saw, “A change is as good as a rest.” I love it, and live it.

On the other hand, sometimes one man’s change is another man’s routine. For me, the difference between washing dishes at home, and at the cabin isn’t enough of a difference, although I know it may be for you.

For me, I live in landlocked Minnesota. I like a nice ocean for my change. Or a mountain. Or both. I’m not picky.

But I digress.

Go go go is wonderful for getting things done, but, unless I am in a big avoidance thing, I need to stop and run in neutral for a while. I used to think I did that when I watch TV, but came to discover that watching TV wasn’t really all that relaxing. It is definitely distracting, but for relaxing, I kinda need to read, or knit, or sit. There are tons of non-TV things to do, and don’t get me wrong, I love to watch TV, but when I need to vacate, other stuff is better at leaving me feeling refreshed.

Sometimes, a nap will do it, sometimes a little drive, or a visit with one of my darling and beloved friends, some of whom are also family. Taking a few minutes to spend admiring my pet snails will give me a quick refresh, as does taking a moment to look out the window. As I practice building these little moments into my life, I find that I can get stuff done, and still take a moment. It’s as much about my attitude as anything else.

How have I changed from go go go to filling my tank before it hits empty?

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Tuesday, October 29, 2013

How to Cultivate Leisure

Did you know that the word “school” comes from the ancient Greek word for leisure? The point was that you have time to study if you aren’t scrabbling everyday just to put food on the table, if you have a table.

So now most of us have leisure time, that is, time when we aren’t at work. The question I put to you is this: How do you spend your leisure time?

If you are like a lot of people I know, you have your time off packed so full that there is hardly time to breathe. With your stuff, and your kids’ stuff, there isn’t time to lollygag, or dillydally. It’s the time we get to ask my favorite question, “What do I want to do next?”

What I have found out is that I have to put it on my calendar. I do what I can to have three chunks of lollygagging time a week, two with friends and one alone.

What makes me lollygag?

I have also discovered that building sleek routines into my days gives me more time to be flexible, to be spontaneous, and still get done what I need to get done.

I check the weather report and my todo list, give the cats their snack, prep my work satchel for the next day, and make sure I know where my boots/umbrella/sunglasses etc are for leaving the house.

I lay my clothes out for tomorrow, put on my jammies, and practice my qigong in one fluid motion.

I hang up my coat, put my keys in the bowl, set my cell phone out for recharging all as one thing.

Why do I enjoy my routines?

I don’t do those things without thinking, I do notice what I’m doing, but they are my groove, and since I am not reinventing the wheel every day, I figure I gain about 20 minutes in the morning for 10 minutes in the evening. I like that return. Plus, my mornings stay calmer, so my day starts smoother.

Why am I peaceful?

Sometimes, what we need to do with our leisure time is waste it. Wasting time, as a treat, is a glorious thing. Giving myself an hour to lie on the floor and stare at the ceiling, so to speak, is rare treasure for me.

And like so many treats, more of it doesn’t make us feel better, but can set up a routine that leaves us feeling depleted, guilty, and bad. It’s like procrastinating. And when I can find the beginning of the habit loop, and disrupt it, I take control again over my habits.

What do I want to do next?

How have I changed from filling up my free time to savoring my time off?