The Beauty in the Mirror

The Beauty in the Mirror

Who do you see in the mirror? Do you see a divine and infinite being? Do you see someone whose beauty shines through? Do you see a beautiful human?

I know you are going to find this hard to believe, but some of us look in the mirror and don’t like what we see. We disapprove of our features, we disapprove of the person who wears them. Poor we. We see our image, and we make a bad face, or have a bad feeling.

How do you think it makes us feel when we scorn ourselves like that? Yeah, kinda rotten.

Why do I like my looks? How do I feel attractive? What makes me so good looking?

This is another one of those things that’s all about attitude. When I don’t like me, I won’t see my self, but only my dislike in the mirror. When I don’t like me, the tiniest flaw will balloon into a deformity. When I don’t like me, I can take my own, lovely body and face and transmogrify them into something I see as hideous.

Saying no to my own self is the ultimate in resistance, the big clench. It is so hard for me to relax when I am rejecting my own body, the home of my spirit.

Why do I love me? What makes me appreciate my appearance? How do I like my face?

When I start seeing who I am when I look in the mirror, when I start seeing my own, sweet self, I start seeing that beautiful person looking back at me. And she often smiles a wonderful smile at the sight of me. I see a person who has thrived through many challenging times. I see a person who has cultivated a loving heart and positive outlook. I see a person I have come to love.

Many of us have physical stuff that often leaves us feeling disgruntled. What we do then is take it personally, as though our bodies are doing this to us, and we don’t like it. I hear some of us saying, “How am I not to take it personally? This is my body.”

We have bodies to support us. We wouldn’t get very far without them. Each of us has things to learn as we go through our lives, different things at different times, and our physical circumstances are here to help us learn some of those things. Seriously. When I can look at my physical situation dispassionately, with a little distance, not taking things personally, I can start to consider what my lessons might be.

Do I need to learn something about humility? Or acceptance? Is this an opportunity to practice going with the flow of my life? Or to love me as I am? Is it about spending more time being present? Or perhaps I need to pay a little more attention to my own well being. Only I can determine what my lesson or lessons are, only I can learn them.

When I look at the current situation as an opportunity for growth, everything changes. I am not saying don’t feel what you feel. Feel it, then let it go and get on with living. Notice your language. Be kind and respectful of the situation,

How have I changed from disapproving of my body to loving it as it is?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 06282014

Singin' the Emo Blues

Singin’ the Emo Blues

I’d feel fine if I didn’t feel so bad.

Sounds like the chorus of an old blues song, doesn’t it. Oh, the blues. Oh, dark nights, lonesome days, feeling bleak or doomed or useless or invisible.

How can I accept my experiences? How do my emotions support me? Why would I enjoy and respect my emotions?

Have you ever stopped to wonder why we have emotions?

Mine were so painful in the olden days that I figured they were just to torture me. A romantic notion, lots of drama, but so not accurate.

We think a thought in that meat-machine of a brain. That thought causes a lot of things to happen; synapses fire, releasing particular neuro-chemicals, which in turn cause certain hormones to flow. Every thought does that. This is the fundamental meaning of thoughts become things.

Now, have you ever had the experience of an adrenalin rush? Maybe you got startled, or missed a stair. You get a sudden flush of heat, your heart pounds, maybe your hands shake a bit. That’s one kind of hormonal flow. We have lots of different hormones and they have different impacts on how we feel; stressed, pain, appetite; the list goes on.

As we accrue habitual thoughts, we get into the habit of habitual feelings. We often don’t even recognize our emotions because they are so familiar. And when they are uncomfortable, it may seem easier to shove them under a rug.

How can I trust my emotions? What makes me accept my experiences?

When I have stuff happen that I don’t like, that I ignore or fight, I am effectively saying “no” to my life, I’m pushing away the very occurrences that could change everything. When I accept my experiences as mine, I stay soft, I stay relaxed. Saying no to life is a clench, and clenching hurts.

Accepting my experience isn’t the same thing as giving up. Surrender, letting go, is, in part, trusting that what is happening is exactly what I need to become my best me. One of my big lessons, one that shows up over and over for me, is owning my power. Why am I strong, capable, and competent? For you, it may be feeling lovable, or worthwhile, or right, or helpful.

Our biggest lesson, the fundamental one, will return again and again, as we learn our smaller lessons. I have emotions to let me know where I am. Am I on my right path? How do I feel? I will feel good on my right path, even if nasty crap is happening. I will feel bad on my dark path, even if lots of nice stuff is going on. Point of view, attitude, negative moral judgments, will all color my experience of the world. As I find ways to accept my experiences, to stop fighting, to stop complaining, to stop refusing, things will lighted and loosen, and I will be freer.

How have I changed from fighting my life to living it all the way?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 03242017

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