Singin' the Emo Blues

Singin’ the Emo Blues

I’d feel fine if I didn’t feel so bad.

Sounds like the chorus of an old blues song, doesn’t it. Oh, the blues. Oh, dark nights, lonesome days, feeling bleak or doomed or useless or invisible.

How can I accept my experiences? How do my emotions support me? Why would I enjoy and respect my emotions?

Have you ever stopped to wonder why we have emotions?

Mine were so painful in the olden days that I figured they were just to torture me. A romantic notion, lots of drama, but so not accurate.

We think a thought in that meat-machine of a brain. That thought causes a lot of things to happen; synapses fire, releasing particular neuro-chemicals, which in turn cause certain hormones to flow. Every thought does that. This is the fundamental meaning of thoughts become things.

Now, have you ever had the experience of an adrenalin rush? Maybe you got startled, or missed a stair. You get a sudden flush of heat, your heart pounds, maybe your hands shake a bit. That’s one kind of hormonal flow. We have lots of different hormones and they have different impacts on how we feel; stressed, pain, appetite; the list goes on.

As we accrue habitual thoughts, we get into the habit of habitual feelings. We often don’t even recognize our emotions because they are so familiar. And when they are uncomfortable, it may seem easier to shove them under a rug.

How can I trust my emotions? What makes me accept my experiences?

When I have stuff happen that I don’t like, that I ignore or fight, I am effectively saying “no” to my life, I’m pushing away the very occurrences that could change everything. When I accept my experiences as mine, I stay soft, I stay relaxed. Saying no to life is a clench, and clenching hurts.

Accepting my experience isn’t the same thing as giving up. Surrender, letting go, is, in part, trusting that what is happening is exactly what I need to become my best me. One of my big lessons, one that shows up over and over for me, is owning my power. Why am I strong, capable, and competent? For you, it may be feeling lovable, or worthwhile, or right, or helpful.

Our biggest lesson, the fundamental one, will return again and again, as we learn our smaller lessons. I have emotions to let me know where I am. Am I on my right path? How do I feel? I will feel good on my right path, even if nasty crap is happening. I will feel bad on my dark path, even if lots of nice stuff is going on. Point of view, attitude, negative moral judgments, will all color my experience of the world. As I find ways to accept my experiences, to stop fighting, to stop complaining, to stop refusing, things will lighted and loosen, and I will be freer.

How have I changed from fighting my life to living it all the way?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 03242017

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