Slow and Steady
It’s a two card day! I love two card days. Today I pulled the luxury card and the capable card; nice complements.
One of our typical make-our-own-lives-suck tricks is what is often referred to as “giving away our power.” When we do that, we are telling the other person that we are incapable, incompetent, and weak. We think we are giving over the charge of our lives, our decisions, our risk, but we aren’t, we are just fooling ourselves. We decide to do what So-and-So says, we decide to be victims and martyrs. It’s likely very unconscious, and we are not to blame for it, but we can take responsibility for ourselves, to choose a different way.
Another great make-our-own-lives-suck tricks is denying the true quality of our lives. Sometimes, we deny the wonder in our lives, or the blessings, or the treasure. Sometimes, we deny how bad it really is, we deny the abnormality of abuse, or dis-ease, or addiction, and we are not to blame for it, but we can take responsibility for ourselves, to choose a different way.
On the one hand, there are usually things that could be better.
On the other hand, there is always something to appreciate, something to value, something for which we could be grateful It may be a small thing, but it’s there, and the more I notice my gratitude, my appreciation, the more it will expand and grow stronger, and the more I will, not only notice, but also receive.
Have you ever done a “savor exercise?” It’s taking a few minutes to really, deeply experience something you eat or drink. You really look at it, you smell it, you feel the texture inside your mouth. You savor the flavors as you chew it slowly, and then, when you swallow, you attend to the tastes left in your mouth.
This exercise is a good, easy way to break in on really experiencing life.
Why am I capable? Why do I savor? Why would I choose to slow down?
Remember the story of the tortoise and the hare? How the hare was all zippy and arrogant, and took a nap, and lost the race? The moral of the story is not don’t take naps. Rather, it is that we can often accomplish what we want to when we slow down inside.
I frequently have todo lists that go on and on. Some tasks will take a while, some are quick. I have found that I get a lot more accomplished when I slow down inside, another way of saying being aware, or mindful, or present. I get more done when I am speaking well of myself to myself than when I am berating me. I get more done when I remember that every task has a end point, at least for today, and, one of my favorite old saws, “This, too, shall pass.”
I used to paralyze myself with perfectionism. I would put stuff off because I needed X do to it perfectly, or I needed a whole day, or some other reason. Perfectionism and procrastination are very good friends. And, I am not doing brain surgery, so good enough is good enough, and I am quite capable of good enough.
How have I change from feeling miserly and incapable, to owning the luxury and standing up for me?
(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 04112014
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