Leaving the Lack Tree Forest

Leaving the Lack Tree Forest

One of the nicest things that has changed in my life has been moving away from lack to abundance. One of my dearest friends talks about living in the lack-tree forest, where you can’t see all the abundance for focusing on the lack. Cuz it’s really just that easy.

We have so much language that is about lack. Curiously, one of the most lacking words is enough. The nature of enough is that, in general, there never is. Enough money, enough power, enough fame, there often is a carrot hanging off a stick tantalizing us with just a little bit more, just the next conquest, the next thing, and then it will be enough.

But it never is.

Why do I enjoy plenty? How is my life abundant? What makes me appreciate the luxury?

When I start looking for luxury, I am often dazzled by how much there is. The pockets of nature filled with interesting stuff to see and smell and hear and feel. The breeze in the trees, birdies do their birdie things, plants that show up in unlikely places, a mysterious, nice smell that you can’t quite pinpoint.

And the luxury of friends and family, When we can get together and be ourselves, and feel loved anyway. The luxury of compassion, the luxury of forgiveness, the luxury of patience, the luxury of kindness.

We have the luxury of choice, to choose to make our lives better, more fun, easier, more relaxed. To choose to flow with our lives, to let them unfold, with all their attendant stuff, more luxury. The luxury of an open heart.

When I start looking for luxury, I am often astounded. The luxury of hearing a stranger’s story. The luxury of grasping a new point of view that makes things nicer. The luxury of having time to work through a challenging situation, or a complex set of feelings, and coming out the other side stronger, deeper, wiser.

The luxury of understanding that I create my reality with my thoughts and feelings and filters, and that if I don’t like this way, I can rethink it and have a new experience. Wow.

The luxury of understanding that happiness is available to me from the inside out. That my happiness is not contingent on outside stuff, but on my way of being in the world. That I can choose to look up, to connect with my perfect self, to relax into my natural life, and flow into nice.

When I gave up having problems, being poor, feeling sick, my life did a big 180. All I had to do was change the words. We never think that using a different word can make such a big difference, but there you go. We have the luxury of so much language that, simply by using a new word, will bring us to a place we feel more comfortable in, happier, less stressed.

Changing my language took some awareness, took some practice, but it has been so worth it. Simply using different words, positive phrases, upbeat concepts, I change my mood, I change my emotions, I change my thinking, I come closer to being my perfect self.

How have I changed from seeing the lack to living a life of luxury and abundance?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 07042014

Perfect Self

Perfect Self

What do you excel at? Where do your strengths lie? How do you know you are great?

Ooh! Great? We kind of aren’t supposed to think we are great, at least not out loud. We have this thing around being full of ourselves, or tooting our own horn, arrogant, haughty, vain, smug. Ew. I bet you guessed that’s not the kind of great I’m talking about.

That kind of doesn’t come from the inside, but is a veneer slicked on over an insecure self. If I need to make you feel small, it’s usually to try to divert you from how small I feel.

I’m talking about that feeling of being great that is at our core. I mean, think about it. You are a miracle, just by being born. Then, all the amazing convergences that had to happen for you to get where you are right now, with your special skills and insights, your amazing heart, your contributions.

It boggles the mind.I mean, think about it for a bit.  Are you boggling yet?

To find your greatness, go within, Grasshopper.

How do I excel? What makes me superb? How am I successful?

My life changed in a very tiny, profound way a million years ago, when I was sitting quietly, minding my own depressed and vaguely suicidal business, and suddenly had the image and momentarily complete understanding that, at the very core of my core being, I was/am/and forever will be perfect. Not pretty good, or swell, or even really neato, but actually, flawless, limitless, perfection, and so is everyone else. All the flaws, all the shortcomings, and faults, defects and lapses are like so much crud that accretes around that perfection. It’s still there, and the more we address our crap, the more that perfection can shine through.

How do I know I am perfect? What makes me see I am fantastic? How am I wonderful?

The more I use my good Creative Questions, the more I choose to relax, refresh, restore, the more I am aware of that core of perfection. The more aware of it I am, the more I like to nurture it. The more I nurture it, the higher the frequency I am vibrating at, to use a kind of woo woo image, cuz it’s all about the vibes. As my normal frequency shifts up, I become more attractive to others with higher frequencies. My relationships are more satisfying and cozy, my activities and tasks are more in line with my purpose. I like to take care of me, and of you, I tend to sleep a bit better, and wake up looking forward to my day with energy and at least a good attitude, if not actual joy.

And, yes, some mornings I wake up cranky. Or exhausted. Or blue. Sometimes I get really P.O.-ed. Or super sad. Some days  I make dumb choices, and see me doing it and can’t seem to stop it. But it’s getting better every day.

And at my core is my perfect self.

At your core is your perfect self. Your miracle of creation self. Your unique, glorious, infinite and divine perfect self. At your core you are radiant, luminous, beneficent, and supremely peaceful.

It’s all inside.

How have I changed from pretending I’m okay to connecting with my perfection?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 05022014

If you found something useful or interesting, or just nice in this contemplation, please +1 and share. Thanks. How do you feel when you make a difference?

How to Find Your Most Beautiful Self

How to Find Your Most Beautiful Self

Oh, you are gorgeous. Your divine self is all shiny and beautiful. I can see that part of you. Can you? Can you see your natural self? Can you see how lovely you are, and how your natural self is so attractive?

Or are you stuck in feeling like you don’t fit in, you don’t match something, you don’t look right? Sometimes we feel like we are too this way, or not enough that way.

Things happen in our lives that mess up our beliefs about how the world works in a whole lot of ways. One of those is about the way we look. We get ideas about how we should look to be attractive, and we often think that the way we should look is the way we don’t look.

We think our face should be different, our muscles should be different. We think we are too tall or short, too fat or skinny, to light or too dark. Our eyes are the wrong color, our feet are too something, or we have a spot.

If you are making your living by your appearance, some of those things may be true, the same way professional athletes have to do different things with their bodies for their jobs. and some people go to extraordinary lengths to change their looks.

This topic has been very interesting to me, especially since I started studying face reading. Wow. Between our faces, our walk, our postures and gestures, we tell each other so much about ourselves. We don’t wear our hearts on our sleeves, but on our faces.

The harder I try to not feel unattractive, the more I struggle to feel attractive, the weirder it can get, and often means I will just feel worse. And possibly just look more and more different.

But here’s the thing. No matter what we look like, when we are relaxed and soften into our natural life, we are radiantly gorgeous. It’s part of the deal. The more we let go of bad, old beliefs, mistrust of the Universe, self-hate and -punishment, the more of our True selves we have.

How do I know I am beautiful? What makes me attractive? Why do I feel lovely?

There is a difference between taking care of ourselves, and struggling to make ourselves attractive. There is a difference between pampering ourselves, and punishing ourselves. The more we relax our thoughts, our emotions, our bodies, the easier it is for us to choose taking care, and pampering over punishing and struggling.

The more we move away from trying to fit a standard, and embrace our true self with love, the more we show up, in our true self, in our natural gorgeous appearance, radiating peace, and satisfaction, bliss and contentment. People see us for who we are at our center, not for our past, or our history or our story.

We respond to the world, then, from our core, our perfect self. We see the world with compassionate eyes, with patient ears, with gentle and powerful touch, with wisdom, and boundaries, and love. And as we show up this way in the world, we create space for our people to find their core, their perfect selves, their natural lives. We can talk and talk, but it’s by living our talk that we make that space happen for our loved ones, for ourselves.

And when we look in the mirror, then, we smile with love at this beautiful person who has done so much to make our life comfortable, joyful, satisfying, and peaceful -- our very own self.

How have I changed from feeling ugly or less than, to seeing the truth of my radiant, beautiful self?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 11292013

Please do not buy a deck of Creative Questions Cards today. If you have the day off from work, find someones you love to spend some time with, feel grateful for something, and peace in.

Being As Soaring Water

Being As Soaring Water

Here is a fundamental rule of the world: I cannot change you. Here is another fundamental rule of the world: I can change me. Here is a curious thing about those rules: When I change me, you often will change, too.

Hilarious! Sneaky! Effective!

How do I choose to change? Why do I surrender? How am I like water?

Water. When it comes to change, I would much rather be like water than a bulldozer. Water can seep. Water can flow. Water goes around, or under, or even drip through. When I am as water, nothing is much of an obstacle. I flow over broken glass, I flow around boulders, I flow through mountains.

If I don’t like the way my life, or my month, or my day, or my morning, is going, I can change it. I am powerful. So are you. Humans are powerful. We have amazingly creative minds. We can make ourselves crazy with worry by imagining horrible scenarios, or we can take the time to come up with solutions. We can create mental prisons for ourselves, or we can liberate our thoughts from the restraint of habit. We can focus on the discomfort in our lives, or we can choose to soar.

Me, I like soaring.

How do I choose to change? What makes me decide to change? Why do I surrender?

I am subject to bad moods, anxious times, feeling really blue; all the normal stuff, like anyone else.. The trick for me is to notice that I’m going there before I get all settled in and cozied up to whatever emo-crap I’ve got going on. Feeling bad isn’t Truth, it’s the result of crappy thoughts running over and over in our heads.

As soon as I catch myself going there, I do what I can to identify the thoughts, so I can change them efficiently and effectively.

The fastest, easiest way I’ve found to do that is with Creative Questions.

Sometimes, I can catch the thought easily, and go from the loop, “why do I suck?”, to “how do I know I’m okay?” Sometimes, I have to find the thought, and that can take a little more effort, “Why do I feel light and peaceful?” “NO!” “Why would I feel light and peaceful?” “I can’t.” “Why could I feel light and peaceful.” “I’m a screw-up.” “How have I changed from feeling like a screw-up to feeling light and peaceful?” “Um..” “How do I feel when I feel light and peaceful?”

Believing that I suck is a delusion. My circumstances may suck. My behavior may suck, but I am not my behavior or my circumstances.

Believing that I’m not good enough, or that I’m wrong, or that I’m bad, or or or, is delusional. At my core, I am perfection. I have goozh layered on top of my perfect self, from years of delusional thinking, abuse, trauma, betrayals, and so on. As I let those things go, I let go the delusion. And then I need to keep an eye on the old habit stuff, to catch it when it comes up, and choose to change.

How have I changed from feeling trapped in my bad thoughts to feeling free?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 11212013

Sexy Beasts

Sexy Beasts

Hotcha cha, the sexuality card leaped out from the deck again today. You’d almost think it was spring. Well, I guess it is, somewhere in the world.

Meanwhile, we all have sexuality, that is, sexual habits and desires. We each have a sexual identity. And because we tend to barenaked when we are being sexual, we also tend to be very quiet about it. Then it seems like it should be a secret, and we all know how much trouble we can get into with secrets.

Why do I accept my sexuality?

Also meanwhile, it’s a topic around which many of us have a lot of feels. Maybe because stuff is near where we poop, maybe because we tend to be private about it. At any rate, there are tons of taboos and proscriptions, and we get lots of ideas.

How do I know my thoughts are innocent?

And again meanwhile, we are wildly creative and brilliant, and like sensations, so it’s a fantastic opportunity to exercise those faculties. it can be so fun!

Why am I creative?

Meanwhile, sharing our sexuality with someone whom we love can feel like a kind of sacrament, a commingling of our divine selves, deepening our understanding of each other, sometimes even shared mystical experiences.

What makes me intimate?

Meanwhile, some of us had stuff happen when we were little that messed with our sexuality. Some of us end up conflating our sexuality with the damage and decide  to hurt others, or to subjugate them. Some of us end up feeling damaged, and hide our sexuality, denying a vibrate and rich part of ourselves.

How have I changed from feeling like damaged goods to enjoying the miracle of my being?

Some of us think that without a partner, we have no sexual identity. Some of us think that because we have a partner, our sexuality should be different from the way it is.

Because we are divine beings, our sexuality is divine, too. Being a divine sexual being doesn’t require a partner, only a little relaxed attention.

As with so much of what makes our lives nicer, when we relax, stop worrying, quit intellectualizing, and enjoy the flow of life,

And when I remember that I am perfect in this moment, I can accept my sexual identity. If I am using my sexual identity to hurt someone, even myself, I need to stop it and get help.

My sexuality, like my creativity, and my loving heart, are gifts for me to enjoy with you, or alone.

How have I changed from feeling pissy about my sexuality to revelling in the glory that is me?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 11102013

Stillness

Stillness

Who are we? Well, I guess I mean, who am I? And, right off the top, I think of the person who owns the hands and mind that is writing to you write now, but that’s not really what I mean at all.

I’m going deep, fellow philosophers, so grab your oxygen tanks and let’s dive in!

I talk a lot about our natural life, and the perfect self. I don’t talk about the perfect self in the abstract. I have experienced it, the first time way back in the day, when I was sitting around, alone, fantasizing ways to commit suicide (oh, yeah, I was a barrel of laughs.)

A feeling came upon me, and there I was, at the heart, at the core, of perfect self. Perfectly calm, perfectly happy, no worries, no anxiety, no pain. Inhaling joy, exhaling joy. I felt infinite, and connected, and whole, completely a part of everything. Perfect self.

I have no idea how long the experience lasted, but it totally changed my life. Because, whenever I remembered to think of it, there it was, at my core, my perfect self, my point of stillness in the chaos, misery, and suffering that was my life.

I saw all the crud I had accreted around it, like a pearl covered in nasty, crusty crap. All I had to do was get rid of the crap. And there you have my philosophy in a nutshell.

Who I am is my perfect self. What I do is chip away at the crusty gunk around it. Perhaps my perfect self, and yours, are one and  the same. Perhaps Perfect Self is the core of the universal mind. That would be cool.

Meanwhile, at my core is that stillness of Perfect Self. Because I’ve been practicing for awhile, I can get there pretty easily, From that place of stillness is born our natural life. It’s easy. It’s fun. It’s creative; it sounds like a great toy from Whammo! Like a Frisbee or a Slip ‘n’ Slide.

That stillness is like the tank that holds my baby snails. The space within the tank is seething with life; the snails, their celery trees and romaine bridges, the food in their picnic area. The water in the tank is teaming with life. But all around it is the stillness of the tank.

We are like that, only our stillness is inside, at our core, fundamental to our Perfect Self. It’s not about silence, or absence, or darkness, or non-sensation, rather it is the defining point, the core, the center of our universe around which everything turns.

When I am aware of that stillness, I lose a little of my attachment to the stuff of my life. I see the movement, the ebbs and flows, the waxings and wanings.

I use Creative Questions to make the path clearer, easier to follow back to my core. Why is it so easy?

I use Creative Questions to chip crud off the pearl of my Perfect Self. How do I know I’m good enough?

I use Creative Questions to live my natural life. Why am I peaceful?

Why do I choose to experience stillness?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 09172013