Semantics: Friend or Foe

Semantics: Friend or Foe

Semantics. Attitudes. Thinking about these a lot lately. How the higher the quality of our semantics, and the better our attitudes, the better our quality of life. Judgment fits in there, too. Stuff that happens is neutral until we put our judgment on it, and then, whammy. Judgment isn’t Truth, it’s an opinion, and that means we can change our minds about it.

Semantics is, simply put, the meanings we attach to words. When we use words, we have feelings about them. In fact, some researchers say that we have an emotional response to every single thought we think, even the unconscious ones.

If I want to improve the quality of my life, I need to pay attention to my semantics. For example, as I am flowing with this chemo stuff, I do not feel like a warrior. When I am a warrior, I need an enemy, and creating an enemy gives that enemy power. My power. Ha! I wanna keep my power, thank you very much. I certainly don’t wanna give it to a disease or to symptoms.

I know a lot of people disagree with me on that one. I think they think that the word “warrior” sounds fierce and tough. For me, it’s not a positive, as long as I have to have an enemy.

Additionally, I do not feel like a survivor, even though I was hours away from death. I thrive. I thrive in my spirit, in my relationships. I thrive in my thoughts. I thrive in my choices.

I choose to use other words than “pain.” Pain has a lot of negative associations for me. It is a rich, full word that I have used to describe everything from self-harm to bad back problems to broken hearted misery to being batshit crazy. Using this word for me is very low vibrations. I like high vibrations.

Why do I choose to be happy? How do I choose to be content? What makes me feel peaceful?

As I am flowing with this chemo stuff, I have opportunities every day to choose to use high vibrational language that makes me feel strong and competent, capable and loving. I use the phrase, “This, too, shall pass.” and choose to relax into whatever is going on.

When I remember that whatever is happening isn’t inherently good or bad, but what I choose to make of it, I have power. I have choice. This is simply experience. I choose to flow with it, or resist it. Resisting takes effort, flowing takes wisdom. Uh oh, did I say that? Kinda judgmental, but I will let it stand.

Being happy generates energy. Being miserable uses energy. Using low vibrational words brings us down. Using high vibrational words raises us up. Having an attitude of positivity keeps us moving in ease. Having an attitude of negativity mires us in many ways.

There are days when I can barely get out of bed. When I am being negative, I feel lazy, worthless, and then I get depressed. When I remember I have choice, I choose to enjoy a soft day of snoozing and reading, video games, movies, dozing, cat patting, and other lovely indulgences. I feel respectful of my being. I love my company. The only difference between the two is my attitude and judgment.

When I notice language I use that brings me down, I modify it. I find words that might be completely neutral for you, but that make me feel awful. I do what I can to stop using them.

How have I changed from being my own downer to choosing to elevate my being?

© Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 10292014

If You Think You Can or You Think You Can’t

If You Think You Can or You Think You Can’t

You know how much I like old saws, good quotes, and pithy sayings. One of my faves is from Henry Ford: If you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.

Capability has less to do with what we can or can’t do, than it does with what we think we are capable of. So many of us mislearned that we couldn’t. For years I felt like there was nothing I could try at which I wouldn’t fail. This is not a recipe for success.

Why am I capable? What makes me powerful? How am I strong? How am I competent?

Capable comes from a word that means to take. When we are capable, we take responsibility for something. We take charge. We take care. We take pride. We take enjoyment. We do our best, and know that it is good enough.

Capable is what we bring to the puzzles in our lives, the topics, the focus points.

Notice I didn’t say, “problem.” Words like problem set us up. Lack words. Sick, pain, problem, poor, can’t, hurt, hard, loss, and so on, are words that define our lives as wanting; disempowering language.

Think about this. Think about what is easier, getting from poor to rich, or from rich to richer? From sick to healthy, or from healthy to healthier? From pain to comfort or from discomfort to comfort? The distinctions are about our attitudes, not about facts.

On the one hand, it’s just semantics, on the other hand, get back, Hannah. There is power in words, and we are wielding it.

I choose to believe that at any given moment, my life is perfect. That means I have exactly what I need to be my best self, to live my best life, right now. And now. And now. I choose to live my life as an empowered individual, resourceful, capable, strong, and soft. I choose to live on the positive side of the scale. I expect my needs are met, so I can let go of that. I expect I have the resources I need, and they show up, I expect to have things go my way, easily, comfortably, fun, and they tend to do just that. It has taken practice, but every moment was worth it.

How do I know I can? Why am I positive? What makes me choose?

When I trust that I am capable, my life opens up. Addressing the topics in my life is easier because I know I can. Changing my attitudes is possible because I take responsibility for me. Letting go of old stuff is doable because I take care with me, value myself, and treasure my life.

When I trust that I am capable, my life brings me interesting things to do. I get to have more fun, learn more stuff, make a bigger difference. When I trust that I am capable, I stop second guessing myself, I don’t doubt I can do it, whatever it is, either alone, or with help.

When I trust that I am capable, I feel proud of my work. I feel good about my actions. I feel like a I make a nice contribution.

How have I changed from I can’t to I can?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 06162014

New Realities

New Realities

I drew the winner card this morning. I was thinking about the strong reactions that word gets when this card comes up. That started me thinking about our ideas of success, and that led me to the whole idea of activism.

An activist activates against something they don’t like. Do you see where this is going? In order to be an activist you have to be up against some kind of enemy.

Resisting. Fighting. On the side of right.

And, Houston, we have a problem. Because now we have taken sides. Now we have some bad thing over there, and in order to maintain our activist, resistance, fighting position, we have to maintain it, that bad thing.

Let’s say I like my position of good guy in the family, for instance. In order to stay the good guy, I have to have a bad guy. I like being the peace-keeper at work, that means I need to have unrest to make peaceful. I like to lead protest groups, we have to have stuff to protest. In order for me to fight injustice, I need to have injustice.

Are you feeling a little uncomfortable? I am.

Why can I see myself clearly? How to I choose my thoughts? What makes me relax?

So, on the one hand, I want to live in a peaceful, passionate, engaged world. On the other hand, by taking sides, and resisting, unconsciously, I have clenched up against stuff.

Consider the differences between “Wipe Out World Hunger” and “Plenty of Food for All.” “Fight Breast Cancer” and “Breast Wellness Everywhere.”

In my own life, I need to look at the roles I identify with. Do I have roles I play that require me to be against stuff? For example, if I see myself as a great advisor, I need you to have problems I can tell you how to fix. Oy. If I see myself as a protector of children, I need someone to be a threat to them. Oy. If I keep my home as a sanctuary, I need my outer world to be, uh, interesting. If I’m going to be a hero, I need you to have stuff I can rescue you from. Sorry.

So, unconsciously, I am facilitating this stuff in order that I can maintain these ideas about me. Talk about mislearnings. Wow.

A lot of it is semantics, like we saw in the slogans above. And consider the differences between “Why am I a peacemaker?” and “Why do I enjoy a peaceful environment?” “Why do I protect my children?” and “Why are we relaxed and comfy?”

Clenched to unclenched.

I am not saying that we don’t want to feed the world, or ensure clean water for all, or have peace on an earth where everyone is well. I am saying that activating is tight, and we do better when we are relaxed. Fighting is all about the clench, and peaceful is relaxed. Identifying our tensed up roles, and unchoosing them, and replacing them with a healthful environment makes me free.

How have I changed from fighting it to softening into a new reality?

(c) Pam Guthrie all rights reserved 02152014

Crafting My Life

Crafting My Life

Innocence, purity, sweet, clear, clean. On the one hand, I love these words, and love the feeling I get from them. On the other hand, I’ve watched enough creepy movies that they can sometimes have a weird connotation. Semantics are interesting.

How like life.

I mean, we all have stuff. That’s part of what life is for. You get stuff, you work through your stuff, and then you live a happy, fulfilling life.

Or not.

So sometimes we are around people who get stuff around clean. They get all freaky about germs, or sexual behavior, or food, or bathrooms.

Sometimes, we are around people who get ideas about what they call “racial purity.” Or “ethnic purity” or even town or neighborhood purity or even departmental purity, though they don’t call it that. In high school we called them cliques.

Sometimes, we are around people who get ideas about innocence, and get all fretty about how no one is innocent. Ever.

Oy.

Why am I innocent? How do I know I am pure? What makes me clear? Why can I trust? Why can I trust my live force? What makes me feel connected with eternal existence?

I want my life to be full of light. Guilt isn’t light. Obsession isn’t light. Negative emotional judgments aren’t light.

The only way my life is full of light is if I fill it up.

I am the only one who can do that for me. You can create space for me to make that happen, but you can’t do it for me. You can beat me, but I am the one who decides whether I am feeling discomfort, or pain. You can love me, but I have to choose to feel loved.

I talk about this a lot, partly to create a space where you can create a life you love, partly to remind me:

I live in the life I create. I create it every single day.The life I live in is not reality, it is my version, based on my perceptions, which are based on vintage experiences that date back to when I was first parsing the world as an infant, creating my map of what it all means; my mind map.

I live in the life I create. I get what I expect most of the time. If I expect crap, I get crap. If I believe I’m really fortunate, my fortune is great. The more I clear out the parts of my mind map that says, “there be monsters” or “unexplored territory” the more space I have for wonderful things, wonderful experiences, wonderful people and relationships, opportunities. Oh, yes, I do.

How have I changed from believing life happens to me to knowing I life the life I create?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 12042013

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