Flow

Flow

Over and over again it boils down to one of two directions. Am I going with the flow or against, upstream or downstream?

I think we should always have three things to pick from, so we will add stuck, swirling around in eddies.

When I go with the flow, I tend to feel fantastic. When I go with the flow, I do what my teachers tell me. When I go with the flow, I get stuff done easily. When I go with the flow, I am a solutions machine. When I am going with the flow, I am an optimist.

I go with the flow a lot. My life is pretty nice.

Sometimes, I don’t .

Interesting things happen when I start upstream.

Most importantly, I get kind of stupid, and can’t tell that I’m going upstream. You’d think I would notice right away that stuff gets harder, that I struggle a bit, that I stop doing the routines that make my life lovely, but I always chalk it up to some outside thing.Life is hard and dark.  Kind of like when I am depressed, I’ve always been depressed.

Going against the current muddies the waters, to push the metaphor. That means, I forget that I’m responsible for me, for my feelings, for my behavior. I forget resolutions and progress, and instead, I worry about problems. Worry. Struggle. Suffer. Oy.

Maybe it has to do with biorhythms. I don’t know. What I do know is that as soon as I notice I’ve gone there, I start relaxing back into my flow. Sometimes the flip is instantaneous, sometimes it take a few days, So far, it seems to take less time each time. Maybe someday I won’t have to go back to the struggle.

Meanwhile, I need to get turned around again. So how do I do that?

I go to my favorite sacred space, my porch.

I sit in my chair, feet flat on the floor, hands resting comfortably on my thighs.

I look at what I can see. I listen to what I can hear. I notice what I can smell. I feel me sitting in the chair. I breathe with awareness.

Present.

Once I feel present, I relax. I start with relaxing my physical body, then my mind and emotions, and spirit. Ahhhhh. Back in the flow. I will ask good Creative Questions, Why do I go with the flow? How am I positive? What makes me peaceful?

And now I feel fantastic again, and life is good.

How have I changed from feeling like I’m swimming upstream to relaxing into the flow?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 06122013