Right as Rain

Right as Rain

You know, I’m right. You are, too. We are all right from our own point of view, and when we get that, boyoboy can we let go of stuff.

When we feel right, we feel good. When we feel like we have to prove we are right, we clench up. That doesn’t feel good, although, it may feel familiar.

Why am I right? What makes me choose? How do I have opinions?

Often, when we aren’t feeling confident in our opinion, or in ourselves, we get more and more shrill about being right.  We may try to pound our opinion into each other, sometimes we get so churned up we will really hurt each other in the name of our opinions. Dang.

Sometimes, these opinions, these beliefs, don’t support us living our natural lives. They can foment feelings of better than/less than, they can agitate feelings of isolation, or hate, dissatisfaction, discord, poor health, crummy jobs, and on and on.

As I choose to grow up, as I let go of my old, unsupportive beliefs, as I bring out more and more of my true self, I relax around being right. And, while I write to you everyday telling you what I think about stuff, I am only offering, and leave it up to you to take away from these thoughts the ones that you like, that feel supportive to you. As the saying goes, “take what you like, and leave the rest.”

Why do I choose my beliefs? What makes me decide?

I know that I can feel absolutely and unshakably right inside and be mistaken on the outside. That means that I take being right much more lightly that I used to. That’s because “right” is a feeling, not a fact. At the same time, as I grow up, I trust my gut way more than I used to. At the very least, it reminds me to be aware, to be mindful.

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” Henry Ford said that. It really brought home for me the idea that right is relative.

I used to take that feeling of being right as an indication that I was carved-in-stone right. Now, I look at my attendant feelings; am I relaxed? Do I feel peaceful? Do I feel strong and competent? Do I feel blissful? Am I in my natural life? If the answer is yes, then hooray for me! If the answer is no, then I can look at where I am clenched, relax, and being right ceases to be important.

When I am living my natural life, I don’t think about being right or wrong. I don’t need to prove that I’m right, I don’t need to prove you wrong. When I am living my natural life, I recognize that there are many ways to accomplish something, many opinions that hold water, many contradictory beliefs that work to support us.

As I live my natural life, I lose my emotional rigidity, my belief in just one way. I understand that lots of ways will work to accomplish my goals and dreams, and so I feel a lot less pressure to do it “right.” I just need to do it. Now, my neck feels better, looser.

I still use my judgment, that’s a valuable gift, but I don’t feel like I need to batter you over the head with my ideas just because we disagree. I am better at shutting my mouth and living my example.

How have I changed from being rigidly right to allowing the way to flow?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2014 all rights reserved 05112014

How do you feel when you are sure?

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