The Peace Core

The Peace Core

So, I’m going to make a confession. Ready?

I used to think that being emotionally healthy would be boring. I thought that if I didn’t have a lot of drama in my life, it would feel mundane and tedious. I thought that if I weren’t in the throes of some intense negative emotion, I would succumb to a moist, grey ennui.

I kind of thought that part of why there were so few enlightened folks walking around was because no one really wanted to give up the excitement.

I was scared to let go of my crazy behavior.

Boy howdy, was I wrong.

How have I changed from thinking crazy to taking responsibility for my own life?

Just because I have reached my peaceful core doesn’t mean I have a boring life.

Really.

I have more fun having fun than I ever did before. Maybe it’s because there is way less junk between me and fun.

Why do I have fun?

At some point, I realized that I like to have fun. That sounds ridiculous, but it was true. For many years what I enjoyed was drama and misery. It was enjoyable to me, in that particular mindset, but it was so not fun.  

I love not having relationship drama. I love not having work drama. I love not having problem drama. I love not feeling crazy. I love not having suicidal thoughts drifting through my head.

How have I changed from choosing drama to choosing peace?

I love having found my core of infinite peace and stillness and mirth and bliss and cosmic hooha. I enjoy how much fun I can have just being present, getting out of my own way.

The more responsibility I take, the more fun I have. Who ever set that up has to have a wicked sense of humor.

Because I am not all wrapped up in how my life isn’t going the way I want it to, I get to enjoy how it’s unfolding. As I enjoy it unfolding, I notice more opportunities for fun. They were always there, I just didn’t see them. When I am focused on crap, I find crap. When I focus on fun, I find a thousand thousand opportunities to have fun.

It really has so much to do with how I am looking at it. It really is that easy. I could wake up tomorrow morning, catalog my aches and pains, anticipate how much X will suck, how so and so is going to be annoying, how the walk from the bus stop will be cold, etc, and have a crappy day. Or not. Frankly, I’d rather have a good day. So I choose my peaceful core, my happy filters, my being present, and taking responsibility for me.

How have I changed from crappy days to enjoying days wrapped around a core of peace?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 11132013