How Do You Do?

How Do You Do?

We are always doing something. Even in my deepest Zen meditation, I am doing: I am doing, breathing, letting my thoughts flow through, being still. Doing. Nothing.

When I love what I’m doing, I put my heart into it. I want my results to shine, I want excellence. When I love what I’m doing, doing it is so fun. It’s time spent living my natural life, feeling joyful, and peaceful, and satisfied, and engaged. Like writing these contemplations every day.

It’s gets a little more challenging when I’m not so crazy about what I’m doing, or if it’s hard to do, or boring. It’s also more challenging if I resent the person asking me to do it. And sometimes the person I’m resenting is me. That may be the worst situation.

One of my strongest personal drives is enjoyment. If I can find a way to enjoy what I have to do, I can do anything. Your personal drive may be the same, or it could be purpose, or productivity, or learning, or feeling like you are doing the right thing, or winning, or something else entirely. It’s a wonderful thing to find out what your favorite personal drives are, it makes it way easier to motivate yourself.

One of my task givers at my Clark Kent job asks me to do what’s referred to in workshops as Bring-Me-a-Rock, you know, “bring me a rock.” “What kind of a rock?” “I’ll know it when I see it.” That, among other things, caused many of his people to quit in frustration. I really didn’t wanna quit. I like my job, for the most part. I had to figure out what I could do to make finding his right rock doable.

Since my thing is enjoyment, I’ve turned it into a game. If I can get him the right “rock” in four moves or less, I win, five or more, he wins. I win more often these days, but I don’t keep score. It keeps it fun for me, and he gets the work he assigns me with way less fuss.

He also will ask for what I like to think of as square eggs. Bring me a dozen square eggs. I’ve learned a lot about how to do research, about finding and using resources, and about what can, and really can’t, be done. And I think of these tasks like being on a scavenger hunt. Sometimes, I’m looking for a real square egg, but sometimes, I need to be clever. And sometimes I’ve amazed myself.

I’ve learned to hear his message, and ignore the yelling. I no longer feel abused, I’m now listening to how many times in a row he will say exactly the same thing. Much more fun for me than feeling abused. Plus it keeps me calm, and that benefits my whole office suite.

The bottom line is that I live inside me, you don’t. You live in there. I can’t change you, I certainly won’t change you by yelling or saying horrible things to you. I can only change me. If I have things that need to be done, I need to find ways to make them enjoyable for me, and I need to find ways to ask you for help that supports your favorite drives. Then it’s fun for everyone.

My task giver may have some trouble asking for what he wants, but he has good heart, and I see him trying really hard to do a good job. (Don’t tell him that, he’d be a little embarrassed that I noticed.) Seeing those things helps me find my respect for a fellow human being, and helps me modify my behavior to treat him respectfully, and to do my best to accomplish the tasks he assigns.

Plus, I will take all the opportunity I can find to live my natural life, because, baby, I like it!

How have I changed from doing grudgingly to loving what I do?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 04202013