Internal Sunshine

Sunny-side In

Over the years, I’ve learned a thing or two about being happy. In fact, I am something of a happiness expert. Not only did I haul myself out of a deep and long-time well of despair into the sunshine, but I’ve help a ton of other people do the same. And because you are reading this, I am assuming I’m showing you the signposts, too.

Many people think that happy people don’t have issues or topics or stuff. We have stuff. We address it and let it go. We do what we can now, and let it go. We take care of ourselves, and our others as best we can, get help as needed, and let it go. We choose to trust that things will work out for the best, we remember that “this too shall pass,” and are always on the look-out for the gift.

Many people think that happy people are shallow, that they don’t understand how awful the world is. We do see, and we see what those other folks are missing. We see the tiny kindnesses people do for each other every day. We contribute our own to the pool, too. We know that each breath we take in peace and joy adds to it. We see that the world is learning, there are more and more teachers and students every day. We know that choosing happiness is an act of great courage when there is so much pressure to be afraid and angry.

Many people think that happy people are different from them, that they had happy childhoods, happy adolescences, and so on. Some of us did, many of us didn’t. We choose to spend our attention on the nice things, the fun things, the productive things. We deal with our stuff so we don’t have ugly issues cluttering up our emotional basements, but we don’t linger there.

Many people think that happy people are never frustrated or thwarted or crabby or sad. “Ha!” I say. We find ways out quicker so we can get back to our internal sunshine. Because we seek solutions, rather than worrying our problems, our roads are smoother.

Many people think that abusers and victimizers and perpetrators and crazies never go after happy people. They do. They go after everyone. We just don’t bite. We deflect, we disperse, we diffuse. They need engagement to do their stuff, and when we don’t engage, they leave and look for someone who will.

We can’t force happiness. It is comprised of a thousand tiny choices each day. The choice to notice and change our bad creative questions for good Creative Questions. The choice to leave thoughts of how hard or bad or sad or icky something is to think about how nice or comfy or sweet something else is. The choice to look up instead of feeling down.

Choosing to feel gratitude and appreciation. Choosing to notice the abundance in our lives. Choosing to find enjoyment in what we do. Choosing to claim our power. Choosing to change the things in our lives that grind us down and choosing to replace them with things that build us up. Choosing to take care and respect ourselves. Choosing to respect and give care to our loved ones. Choosing to take our work seriously. Choosing to play.

I’m not going to list a thousand, Ten will suffice as an example.

Happiness will grow if we nurture it and relax and slow down a bit inside. Happiness will blossom if we cut away the deadwood and clear the thatch. And when it comes from deep inside, it comes with peace, and that, my dear, is wonderfully contagious.

How have I changed from trying to force it to letting my happiness flow?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 02042013