Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Thwarted or Supported?


Thwarted or Supported?

Sunburn, windburn, frostbite, heat stroke. Ice, wind, storms, floods, drought. Our environment. We fortify ourselves against it. We curse it, we blame it, we modify it. We fight and fight and fight it. We complain about it all the time; it’s too hot or cold, it’s too noisy, it’s too crowded.

There are several ways to look at the environment, from our personal standpoint. One way is that it is simply something to be borne, like a pox or a plague. We grumble about it, whatever is going on, but it’s more of an inconvenience than anything else.

Another way is that it is out to get us, that it gets too whatever to annoy and thwart us, we take its states as personal affronts. The weather is too hot AT ME! It’s too rainy AT ME! Road construction is here to bedevil us. It’s all personal and it’s all about something polluting our personal space.

Or we look at our environment as a constant gift from the Universe offering us opportunities to grow, to enjoy, to expand. As the seasons run through their courses, we appreciate their varied beauty. We appreciated the sensations we can enjoy. We see the beauty in light and shadow, in man- or nature-made vistas. We appreciate the noise as a tool to help us learn focus. Inclement weather helps us expand our comfort zone. The lushness of summer and the black bones of winter teach us to see beauty in many different ways. Traffic affords us a time to relax and still our inner selves. The people around us give us opportunities for compassion and understanding.

Curiously, the way we perceive our environment often mirrors how we see ourselves in the world. Is the world there to thwart us or support us?

From time to time I find myself clenching up against my environment. I feel tight and antagonized, or angry and impatient. Since these feelings are not my norm any more, I notice them pretty quickly these days, and look at what I’m thinking. It’s usually the same thing going on.

Expectations.

I get ideas about how stuff should go. It’s spring, so it should be mild and sunny. It should be fragrant and peaceful, and everyone in my life should be happy about it. Aren’t I cute? When I come up with ideas about how things should go, I am often disappointed. These ideas are fantasies about the present, like worry is, like guilt is, and they work against my enjoying my life.

When I can let go of my expectations about how I think things should be, I can relax into how things are. When I relax into how things are, it is easy for me to see the gifts the present is offering me, gifts I couldn’t find in my expectations.

Expectations get in our way a lot. Like many other tools, we can use our expectations to enhance our lives or make them harder. We have expectations about everything, from how our loved ones and public servants should behave to how the weather should be, how we should feel, what our lives should look like.

When we can align our expectations with our natural life, we have a good idea of what we want. When we know what we want, it’s like paving our path in life, instead of feeling like we are chopping our way through a jungle full of pitfalls and danger and disappointment.

Most of the time, I expect that I will have a good day. I don’t have expectations about how I will have it. I expect that I will love to spend time with my people, I expect that I will have a sense of joy, of peace, of appreciation. When I have these expectations, I am rarely disappointed.

How have I changed from feeling like my environment is against me to relaxing into it’s bounty and treasures?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 05292013

No comments: