Magic Words

Magic Words

I love it when I find magic words, words that can change my environment both inside and out. Creative Questions seem like magic words to me, using Creative Questions changes things so quickly and easily.

One of my most favorite Creative Questions is “Why am I grateful?” When I ask this question, stuff happens, amazing and wonderful stuff.

“Why am I grateful?” is a direct line to our perfect self. It’s a brilliant manifestation of our grownup selves. It connects us with the outside world, brings up warm feelings about the people in our lives, helps us recognize the value of our possessions. Gratitude and appreciation are super efficient for building on our relationships.

When I feel grateful, I recognize that I live in luxury. The more I notice that, the more luxury I find. When I appreciate my loving friends, I feel more friendship, I feel closer, I have more intimacy. When I appreciate my wonderful body, I notice how she feels, and what she wants, with more clarity and compassion, and I treat her better.

When I am feeling upset about something; scared or mad or agitated; going to grateful is a nice pacifier, it will calm and soothe, a cooling balm on my spirit. Likewise, when I am having trouble sleeping, listing the things I am grateful for, the things I appreciate, that which I am thankful for, well, sleep comes more easily and I rest more deeply.

In ye olde Dark Ages, I waited for things to be grateful for. I thought gratitude came only with life-altering stuff, so when life-altering stuff showed up for me, I had no habit of gratitude. I was a thankless jerk with a habit of entitlement, a gross lack of appreciation, a thankless attitude. I was also miserable, depressed, full of self-loathing.

Once I started to grow up for real, I began to actively seek out things in my life so that I might begin to feel gratitude. Slowing down to really taste my morning coffee, to feel sunshine on my face, to stretch my muscles, to lift something heavy with ease. Noticing how I feel about you, really seeing you, appreciating you and your wonderful qualities. Appreciating how cool you are leads me to feeling grateful for your friendship, for all your kindnesses to me.

Writing a little thank you note in my own handwriting is another way I like to practice gratitude. I know I love to receives thank yous for the work I do, so I assume you do, too. I also like to write notes to people’s supervisors to let them know what a good job their employees are doing. And when I appreciate the customer servicer person on the other end of the phone I am always delighted at the quality of service they give to me. We both come out of the interaction feeling happy.

Practicing gratitude and appreciation each day has another benefit. Gratitude and appreciation are gateway feelings leading to the hardcore emotion, happiness. The more we practice feeling grateful and feeling appreciation, the shorter the hop to authentic happiness. By taking time each day to notice what we are grateful for, by slowing down our insides enough to appreciate our environment, our people, our services, our transport, our appliances, and so on, by feeling thankful for our jobs, our homes, delicious, wholesome food, lovely, useful clothing, and so on, we carve pathways into our brains that make it so easy to feel grateful, and from there to letting our happiness burble up from the heart of our natural life.

How have I changed from feeling entitled to nurturing my gratitude and appreciation?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 09052013