Unlikely Gifts

Unlikely Gifts

The card I pulled today was the Why am I spiritual? card. It made me think about “best teachers” again, a concept I have found wonderfully useful, so maybe you will, too.

Each of us has lots of people in our lives. They play a multitude of roles for us, with us. Some of them we teach, some teach us. Of our teachers, some teach by example, some teach by creating situations for us to work through. One might call them spiritual puzzlers.

These Best Teachers are really super annoying. They are often thoughtless, full of bad behaviors, sometimes they are even mean or abusive. You know you’ve got your own best teacher because they not only make your day worse with their naughtiness, but they move into your head, rent-free, and take up valuable real estate.

You know you have your very own Best Teacher when you find yourself rehashing old set-tos with them, and how you could have bested them, or imagining fresh set-tos, and getting yourself all riled up when they aren’t even there.

Perhaps they get you to yell with them in anger, or to throw stuff. Or maybe they scare the bejesus out of you. They are adept at throwing us into our weakest places.

They bring out the worst in us.

That’s why we are blessed with them, our Best Teachers; to bring out the worst in us so we can clean it up and let it go.

I know, I know, but I don’t make the rules, I just report ‘em.

I have found that, in general, I have one BT at a time. I have also found that there is usually one very important lesson they present. Sometimes it is about unlearning something I’ve believed for yonks. Sometimes it is about learning more about a quality like understanding, or patience, or not to be patient. Patience isn’t always a good thing.

I had one BT who would come up to me at work and start yelling, telling me how worthless I was. Seriously. I learned two things; don’t take on stuff that says I’m bad. It’s not true. And, just because you are freaking out doesn’t mean I have to go there with you. It was so strange to just sit there, finding my calm center with someone yelling at me, often with an audience, but I succeeded.

When I learn the lesson, really get it, something happens. Sometimes they leave my life. Seriously. They move away, or get a new job, or maybe they just disappear. However it goes, they are gone. Othertimes, they just stop being so annoying. That’s weird, but really nice.

I love it when I recognize a BT. I know I will have some challenging times, but that at the end of it, I will be happier, cleaner, and lighter in my spirit.

Taking a few moments to identify your current BT, and then to spend a little time thinking about the gift they are bringing you is guaranteed to bring lovely results. Identifying your bad-behavior responses to your BT will help. It will also help to love yourself for showing these behaviors so you can clean them up, because dark-sides need love, too.

How have I changed from disliking my annoying people to recognizing my Best Teachers and the gifts they bring?

(c) Pam Guthrie 2013 all rights reserved 12212013